Finding Overflowing Joy Through Pruning, Presence, And Persevering Love

Ever felt like your calendar is full but your soul is running on fumes? We sit down with Bible teacher and author Tara Dew to get honest about why doing for God often feels easier than being with God, and how abiding can become a daily rhythm instead of an occasional retreat. Tara brings warmth, wisdom, and practical ways to cultivate a life that actually overflows.

We unpack John 15 with fresh clarity: joy grows as we accept pruning, live in God’s presence, and persevere in love. That joy is not the same as happiness; it holds steady when life doesn’t. 

Tara offers simple practices for busy women: arrow prayers, scripture on sticky notes, worship woven into chores, and reframes Sabbath as a weekly rehearsal of trust. We also talk about stepping outside to remember our limits in a world that trains us to act like we’re omnipresent and always on.

The conversation then moves to Psalm 23, the heart behind Tara’s new book, Overflowing Peace. “You are with me” becomes more than a line—it’s the anchor that lets us sit at God’s table even when enemies still linger. For women pouring out in motherhood, careers, or ministry, Tara shares gentle, doable resets: say the brave no, delegate where you can, rise a few minutes early to be with God before the noise. We close by spotlighting her passion for equipping pastors’ wives and pointing you to communities and resources that sustain the long journey.

Get Tara's book, Overflowing Joy, at the link below:

https://a.co/d/bOgbm6M

Preorder her upcoming book, Overflowing Peace, at the link below: 

https://a.co/d/dFNzGUU

Learn more about Tara's ministry at prepareher.com 

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Transcript

Welcome And Guest Introduction

Speaker 0:04

Welcome to the Table of Greats podcast, where every woman has a seat. Every story matters, and Jesus is always at the center. We're here to create space for real conversations and faith-field stories that help you grow in your walk with Jesus. So grab your favorite cup of coffee and pull up a chair. Because at his table, there's always a seat for you.

Tessah 0:30

Ladies, welcome back to the Table of Grace podcast. I'm Tessa Lepekkey and I'm with my co-host, Tracy Smith, and we're here with a very special guest in studio, and that is Tara Dew. We are so excited to have her with us today. And I'm gonna go ahead and pass over the mic to you, Tara. Share a little bit about who you are, what you do, all the things.

Tara’s Story And Family Life

Tara Dew 0:52

So I'm so glad to be here in person. Yes, so excited with you all. Um my name is Tara, and I live in New Orleans, Louisiana. My husband is the president at New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary in Level College. Uh, but our claim to fame is that we're the parents of two sets of twins. Love that. So Nathan and Natalie are 18 freshmen in college, and Samuel and Samantha are 15. They're sophomores in high school. That's great. So life is full and wonderful, and um I spend my days with my kiddos, but also teaching women across the country about God's word. And so our life is wonderful. We love it. But I'm so glad to be here with you tonight. Yes. Oh God.

Traci 1:31

That's so incredible. I did think about this. Were did you have for any length of time four children in diapers at the same time?

Tara Dew 1:38

Oh yeah. Oh yeah.

Traci 1:40

Wow.

Tara Dew 1:41

Bless you. When the youngest set were born, the older set were still two and a half. So we had four kids, two and under, and it was a blur.

Tessah 1:50

Yes. Yeah. Yeah. That's crazy. No, I I have just wanted diapers, and I could not actually imagine four. That is me neither.

Tara Dew 1:59

That takes a very stopped getting using diapers.

Tessah 2:03

That's like, that's like, yeah, that I hope you all had a celebration for that because that would have only had a car. No, seriously. Yeah, seriously. And I think Tracy, you mentioned this. Do you have twin dogs too? We did have twin dogs. Yes.

Tara Dew 2:17

Boston Terrier.

Tessah 2:19

Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh. My family is the Boston Terrier family. So they're the most energetic curriculum.

Tara Dew 2:24

We love the number two. How can you just have one?

Tessah 2:27

That's so funny. I love it. No, that's so good. Um, I do hope that life maybe doesn't find me. I do not want two sets of twins. That would be, I think the Lord knows that. I'm not even gonna say that, you know, I'm not even gonna go there. That would be a lot. I'd have to get a bigger house for sure. I'd have to come live with training. And she'd have to cook for me, too. And help me buy diapers. Um, so Tara, you are the author of Overflowing

Abiding In John 15 Explained

Tessah 2:53

Joy. You actually have another book coming out. We'll talk about that at the end. But um, our women's ministry word of the year is Abide, which beautifully ties into Overflow and Joy. And I would love for you to share a little bit about that book and also how would you describe what it truly looks like to abide in Christ.

Tara Dew 3:10

So Overflowing Joy walks through John 15, and it's the famous I'm the vine, you are the branches chapter, all about abiding. But if we really don't understand the metaphor that he's using there, we miss a lot of what he's talking about. And abide is not really a word that we use in English language today, but it comes from the word abode, which means to dwell, and and the climax of John 15 is where we are reminded that we are branches and apart from our vine, we can do nothing. And so overflowing joy, the book, walks through John 15 and kind of three surprising pathways or lessons that Jesus teaches us about how we can find true joy uh as we abide with him. And um I give three P's so that everybody can remember it. It's through God's pruning, through God's presence, and then persevering in his command to love. And um, those three things, surprisingly, do bring joy because in them we learn dependence on the Lord, how to trust him, how to submit to him, and how to allow the Holy Spirit to bear the fruit in us of love and joy and peace and all the other things too. Yes. Um, but joy doesn't come just from white knuckling it and trying harder. It truly is found in Christ. And that's the beautiful phrase, you know, in me, in me, in me, that he repeats over and over through John 15. Um, and that's what abiding means. It means to make your home with him.

Traci 4:46

So good. It's so interesting to think that joy, which is something that we think is positive and everyone's seeking, is attached to pruning, which no one is looking for that. That's exactly right. Yeah, that's an amazing connection.

Joy Versus Happiness In Hard Times

Tara Dew 5:02

Well, joy is not happiness, happiness is based on your circumstances. Um, and so people will say, I have joy because I got a pedicure, I have joy because I had a massage, I had joy because I went on Hawaiian vacation. But the fruit of the spirit is actually found in circumstances that are not favorable.

Speaker 1 5:20

Yeah.

Tara Dew 5:21

Because even a non-Christian can say they have joy when things are good. But when things are bad, when things are hard, when suffering comes, a Christian can say, I still have joy. Yes. Even though I love that that hymn, even though the sea bills roll, it's well with my soul. And that's really what the fruit of the Spirit are. They are these virtues and these characteristics that are found only by believers who are found in Christ. And that nothing this world throws at us can take those things away because we've got the Holy Spirit that produces it in us, not based on our circumstances, but our salvation.

Tessah 5:59

So good. No, I love I love all of that connection. I love how you mentioned it as well, because we literally had a whole podcast two-part series over that right before you. It's such a Holy Spirit connection. I love that. No, yeah, God's so good. No, we literally like had a two-part series with another guest over that. But it it all ties together with joy and abiding. Um, you mentioned, you know, it's not finding joy and abiding isn't that white-knuckle grip of just trying to hustle harder and do harder. Um, I'd love for you to talk a little bit about why do you think so many women find it easier to do for Jesus, to do work for Jesus rather than abide with him?

Tara Dew 6:35

I think it's because we um in our human nature like to rely on ourselves. We have a self-sufficiency um problem. Yeah. And that is, I mean, that is goes all the way back to Lucifer's fall, to Eve's fall. And that is our human flesh that wants to be good enough for God, or to do things that would please him, or um to you know, produce these things in and of ourselves. But that is not at all what the life of the spirit

Why We Do For God Instead Of Abide

Tara Dew 7:15

looks like, you know, or to walk by the spirit or to be in step with the spirit. And when we learn that our joy, our satisfaction is not found in doing, but rather in being his child, it changes the way we uh we emphasize things or prioritize things in our life. I think busyness is a huge problem in our society today. And I think people often will equate their identity with how busy they are. And we find our you know, our our power, our control, our prominence, whatever you want to call it, your value and how busy you are. And and if we're not careful, we get into this competition between who's busier, right? And we're like, what are we doing? Yeah, what are we doing? Yeah, because so often, if if Satan can't make you bad, he's gonna make you busy. And you're gonna begin to rely on your own strengths, your own giftings, your own education, your own experiences to do for God when He really just asks us to be with Him. And I'm so reminded of Mary and Martha, you know. I mean, Martha, bless her, she was a wonderful hostess, right? She was cooking and feeding and doing all the things, and that is so remarkable. Yeah, but Jesus says Mary has chosen the one thing that was better, and that was to just be with him. And so I think it's such a reminder for us that the word abide means to remain or stay. Yeah, and this world has flashy, shiny things that make us want to chase it and run after it, thinking that's what's gonna give us that satisfaction. When he says, no, it's found in staying with me, in being with me, in finding your wholeness in me. And you know, we learned this concept kind of during COVID and the stay-at-home order, but that's really what a bite is. It's a stay-at-home order with God, not running out the front door, not trying to chase after the things. Yeah. Um, and so I often remember Mary and just think, God, I want to be like that. I want to just sit at your feet. I want to rest in your presence. I want to find my wholeness and my joy in nothing but you. Yeah.

Tessah 9:40

Oh, that's so good. Yeah, no, I feel like I definitely can relate to Martha. My dad calls me Martha often. Um he's always he's always like, I have a Martha and a Mary. He's talking about me and my sister, because my sister's so like usually like the chill one, like very like kind of, and I'm just like, what are we, what are we, what are we doing? Yeah, I'm first daughter energy type, like just get it done, host the, you know, like host the stuff, do the things, plan the family vacation. Always like, what's the next thing? What are we doing for the holidays? Always looking ahead. Um, and I'm always challenged um and humbled. The Holy Spirit's always humbling me and going, Tessa, you need to calm down. You need to take a deep breath, you need to chill.

Practical Rhythms For Abiding

Traci 10:15

Well, our culture, I think, has created this um dynamic that stillness is is something that means we're lazy or idle, or you know, if you are still and quiet for a lengthy period of time, immediately there's a fluster in you about I should be doing something. I should and I think with social media, with everyone's life just lived out in front of everyone else, there's a need to present anyway, as if we're so, so, so busy.

Tessah 10:44

Yeah, and I think even when you said that, I think a lot of times, even in my own life, I relate busyness with myself. Like, what can I do? How can I show up? How can I do all the things? And stillness is almost like you're not doing the work, but you're letting God do it. Um, and that's hard because you're sometimes like, okay, God, I have this timeline. Are you gonna do this? When are you gonna do all these things? And so I think like when it comes to abiding and when it comes to rest and stillness and being in his presence, I think it's almost it's hard to almost walk that out. Like, what does that look like? And I know if you've lived obviously, we mentioned you had four kids and diapers. I just don't know how you did that. That's impressive. Um, but how do when you were in that season of busyness or even through seasons of your life, what does that look like? Just trying to find that stillness and that rest, even in the midst of chaotic, crazy life.

Tara Dew 11:36

Yeah, I think you can think about it as daily rhythms, weekly rhythms, monthly rhythms, yearly rhythms. So let's talk like daily, right? So I think we have in our minds sometimes that okay, he's wanting us to have a 45-minute quiet time with him where there's no other distractions. Well, I'm just gonna be honest. There's a lot of times in life that that is just not feasible, right? And so don't let Satan make you feel like if you don't have 45 minutes, then it's not worth it. If you've got five minutes in God's word, if you have time to read one verse, that is food for your soul that day. And then be like the cow that's chewing the cud, like just chew it over and over and over. Think about it, meditate it, let it become part of you. Um, sing worship songs. I mean, as I was rocking my babies, as I'm nursing my babies, as I was loading the dishwasher, right? Like worship music was on because it was just filling my mind and my heart with truth. I would also write scripture on post-it notes and I would stick it places that I could see it. So I feel like daily rhythms, I mean, you might you might not have like 45 minutes of peace and quiet, but you can walk with God through your day and establish those moments of just being in his presence, even though it might not look like a perfectly still, quiet place. I call them arrow prayers. I I like to just talk to God as I'm going through my day, like just shoot up an arrow prayer to him, right? He is there with you. So, so talk to him. You know what I mean? When you see a beautiful sunset, thank him that he's a God of color. When you eat beautiful food, thank you, God, for that. You know, so I think that we can go through our daily life with these rhythms of just remembering he's there, he's with you. Abide with him, stay with him. On a weekly, you know, where what's your Sabbath? I think it is a command in the Ten Commandments that we have a Sabbath day and we'll do really good with don't commit murder, don't commit adultery. But often we don't do great with that Sabbath one. And so Sabbath does not mean a cease from all activity. You're not just sitting in a rocking chair twiddling your thumbs, right? But it literally is a break to show yourself and remind yourself he's God and I'm not. He is the one that provides for my needs, not me. We're not meant to work seven days a week. Right. So if you work with your hands in the week, maybe your Sabbath looks like something with your mind. If you work with your mind a lot, maybe it looks like something with your hands, you know? So, like I love being in my flower beds and my gardens, and because I do a lot with my mind during the week, so being outside and doing that is very peaceful to me. I have other friends that are seamstresses, so they work with their hands all week long. So sitting and reading a book is wonderful for them, right? So think about what is a restful activity for you and try to do that on a Sabbath. Like reset your soul, reset your heart and your mind. Monthly, I mean, are you having a date night with your spouse? Are you doing something fun with your kids? Like, are you taking a break from work and doing something? And then same with once a year for vacations. I think it's important, y'all. So think about your life in these daily, weekly, monthly, yearly rituals and and think through how I can establish rhythms where I am depending on the Lord, I'm trusting him, I'm not working myself to death, but truly enjoying the life that he's given me and my marriage and my kids and my coworkers and my friends. You know what I mean? So having those breaks, I think is really helpful. And so those are things that we've tried to just put into our life. We love camping, we love going on hikes in the woods.

Sabbath, Rest, And Resetting Pace

Tara Dew 15:10

So those are things that we try to do because it gives us a break and allows us to just rest and reflect on God our own.

Traci 15:16

Those things are doable. And I think I think a lot of people think what you said earlier, that there's that I have to be still, I can't do anything. Just think about the Lord, pray to him all day long. But that that makes sense. That makes sense. Yeah, yeah. That's so good.

Tara Dew 15:33

And honestly, I mean, counselors will say if someone comes to them with a depression or anxiety, they'll say the first thing they tell them to do is get outside for 20 minutes a day.

Speaker 1 15:40

Yes.

Tara Dew 15:41

There's something really powerful, y'all, about going for a walk, being outside, being reminded that he is the creator, he's the one who's upholding it all by the word of his power, not us.

Speaker 1 15:50

Yes.

Tara Dew 15:51

And um and making sure that we are resetting our heart because it's so easy for us to think that we're God.

Traci 15:59

Yes.

Tara Dew 15:59

And our cell phones make us feel like this because the world's at our fingertips, and we can have omniscience, we can know everything because we've got Google, right? Or we're omnipresent. We can be in all these places because I can FaceTime, even though I'm in a different state. And so without thinking about it, our world today can can twist our mind into thinking that we're God and that everything depends on us, and that however hard we work, we're gonna provide for ourselves. We can be independent. I mean, we live in America, we we prize independence. But so much of God's economy is not that. It is a dependence on him, it is a reminder he is God. We are not. He is the one who is omniscient and omnipresent and uh all powerful. Absolutely. And and we're not, and I think when we go outside, when we change our daily rhythms, when we reflect on his truths of his word, it's that concept of just abiding and remembering, depending. God, I need you every hour. I need you. You know, there's nothing we can do without him.

Tessah 17:05

So good. I love that. All that I'm like, I'm gonna have to listen back and take notes because it was that good. Um so flow uh going into your book that you it's about to come out in a few months. Yep uh your new book, Overflow and Peace, Peace, Overflow and Peace, kind of feels like a natural continuation of through Overflowing Joy, and it actually covers another one of my favorite Bible verses and chapters in in scripture. Um what kind of led you to write about peace and share a little bit about that book you have coming out?

Tara Dew 17:38

So it's funny, both Overflowing Joy and Overflowing Peace have come from my speaking and teaching at churches. And so what I love is that I am a speaker and teacher. And so Lifeway has just asked me to write down some of the things that I have taught. So overflowing joy has come from John 15 because there's a lot of women's ministries that do conferences on abiding. Yes. Overflowing peace comes from Psalm 23, which is another passage that just churches have asked me to speak on a lot. And as you look at that beautiful metaphor of a shepherd and a sheep, once again you find this beautiful part found

Creation, Limits, And Dependence On God

Tara Dew 18:20

in verse four, for you are with me. And it's that same concept of the vine and the branches apart from me, you can do nothing. And I'm the shepherd, you're the sheep, I'm with you, and you can walk through the darkest valley, and you can, you know, do all of the things because he's with us. And so it's the same concept, just in a different chapter. But um overflowing peace comes really from where it says, My cup overflows, my cup runs over, and the cup is our life. Right. And it's such a reminder, Jesus says in John 10, 10, the thief comes to steal, kill, and destroy, but I have come to give you life and life abundantly, life overflowing. And that is what the Spirit does for us when we find ourselves in him, then he produces this life in us that will overflow to other people. And it's all relational. Love, joy, peace, patience, they're all relational. Yeah, but it's something that he does in us. And so overflowing joy will come out in January of 26. It's available for pre-order right now on Amazon. But it is a um, it really does flow directly from overflowing joy because all the fruit are found and abiding in heaven. Right, right.

Traci 19:35

So good. I love in that passage where he says he prepares a table before me in the presence of my enemies. And the idea that God intends for me to sit and be nourished and fed, even when the things that are rising against me have not been conquered. Yeah, that is such a beautiful picture to me. I love that so much. So what's F what's next?

Tara Dew 20:00

You've got to keep this going. Overflowing love will come out in 28. Yes.

Traci 20:05

Love that.

Tara Dew 20:06

But then I think that's gonna be the trilogy.

Tessah 20:08

You know, I'm doing it.

Traci 20:09

I think maybe you should just keep on going.

Tessah 20:12

So for even women in ministry or maybe not in ministry, women who are chasing little kids or hustling in their career, doing all the things who are constantly pouring out. What would be your advice for staying filled and connected to the vine? Maybe just where they're at. I know we talked a little bit about those daily rhythms, but just maybe the woman sitting here and maybe listening to this podcast and she's just burned out. She's just can't catch a break, feels like she's just out of breath, um, and just has a heavy heart. What would what would be something you would you wish you could just grab our hands and say to her?

Tara Dew 20:47

Well, first of all, sister, I love you, and I'm sorry that you feel overwhelmed. I know that there are so many that feel like that. I have felt like that. Um the beautiful thing about life is that

New Book: Overflowing Peace From Psalm 23

Tara Dew 21:00

it's not gonna be like that forever. Yeah. So I think it's such a reminder that our God is a God of new mercies every day. And you can make choices today that will reset. If life just feels out of control, if if you feel like you're barely keeping your head above water, then it's okay to kind of push the reset button and figure out okay, what has gotten out of balance, what's gotten out of whack, what can I scale back from? Sometimes we have a hard time saying no, right? And we can feel ourselves just becoming so overstretched and overburdened. And so I think it's okay to look at your life and think, okay, this is not this is not how I want it to be. I feel out of control, not self-controlled. And so think about that. What are some what are some changes that you can make? Um, are you able to get up and start your day a few minutes early and spend time with the Lord before you go do anything else? Is there something that you can delegate to somebody else? Is there something that that maybe you've overcommitted and you can pass on to somebody else and let them have a chance to serve in that way? But I think it's okay to recognize that life is not the way I wanted it to be. And it doesn't have to stay that way. It might be that you're in a really heavy work season because of a project and you just have to get through that. Well, then when you turn it in, then maybe make some adjustments. But if you're just in life and you're feeling really overwhelmed, well then pray. Ask the Lord, is there something that I can adjust? Is there something I can change? Um is it just that you need to spend time with the Lord and He'll give you the strength to do what He's called you to do? Um Or are there other things we can become so overcommitted, we can become so overstretched, we can overspend with finances and everything else. And I think resets are good. Yeah. And our God is a God of resets. He He resets every day, He resets every year. There's even talk about seven years in scripture, the Jubilee year, 50 years. So our God is a God who resets for his people when they are out of control. And so I think that that's a good habit that we can have. And so, sister, if you're feeling that way, number one, God sees you, number two, he loves you. And pray and ask him, What re what do I need to reset in my life? Or is he asking you to just keep pressing on in him right now and depending on his strength and not your own to finish that? But only he can give you that wisdom for what needs to happen. But but as you abide with him, as the Holy Spirit fills you, then he wants us to live lives that have truly overflowing life and joy and peace. He doesn't want us to be barely surviving. That's what the world does. But as Christians, that's not the life he's called us to. So either depend on his strength or maybe make some adjustments to reason.

Traci 24:00

Tara, one of the things that I read about you that I find so

Encouragement For The Burned Out

Traci 24:05

um encouraging and I appreciate so much that you're doing is the passion that you have for pastors' wives and the way you are creating space for them uh to feel equipped to, because I don't know any pastor's wife who would say that's his job.

Tara Dew 24:24

I do. I love pastors' wives. And um we spend an entire class on time management because of this very thing. Ministry is demanding, and so often pastors' wives are working outside the home and they have kids at the home and all these things, but it is my passion. It's what I study for my dissertation. Uh it's what I get to spend week in and week out at New Orleans Seminary training student spouses, but also pastors' wives across the country, and um and I do feel like they are being stretched and being asked to do a lot of things that they necessarily haven't had the equipping for. That was my story. Um, but I don't want them to go out and feel like they don't know anything or they don't know anybody, and so um it is a joy to get to do that.

Traci 25:07

It is a beautiful ministry, and thank you for doing that welcome.

Tara Dew 25:10

Yes, you're welcome. I know it's such a blessing. I love women in all ages and stages and phases.

Tessah 25:16

That's good. That's all that's what the podcast is about, too. That's right. Yes, so many different seasons of life of all of our women's ministry. Yeah, it's it's so cool to see so many different people represented um what throughout our women's ministry too. Um so Tara, tell us a little bit about where we can find you and connect with you, maybe pre-order your book. I'll definitely add the link in the show notes there. Um just tell us a little bit about how we connect can connect with you online.

Tara Dew 25:43

So on Facebook, if you're on Facebook, I do have a ministry author page. So you can just look up Tara Dew, T-A-R-A-D-E-W, and then it's a Dash, Bible Teacher and Author.

Speaker 1 25:54

Yes.

Tara Dew 25:54

And I try every couple days to post an encouraging verse or song or article or maybe a book that I've read that's really encouraging. Um just a way to serve women who I might not get to rub elbows with week in and week out. Uh so that's on Facebook. Um, all the books are available on lifeweight.com, but also Amazon, Barnes and Noble, wherever books are sold. Nice. And then um everything that we have at New Orleans Seminary for Women can be found on prepareher.com because we want to prepare her, whoever the her is. Nice. So on that, that's all about the women's the ministry to women program, the ministry wives programs. We host an annual conference called a bide at New Orleans Seminary. So all of that can be found on prepareher.com.

Tessah 26:42

Awesome. I love that. Tara, thank you so much for being with us today. It's just it's been so encouraging to get in and actually sit down and talk to you, which is very rare for our interviews. Um, so thank you so much for being with us. Thanks for having me.